Willie Geist: First Impressions of Augusta

Golf Digest's guest at the 2011 Masters was Willie Geist, host of MSNBC's "Way Too Early with Willie Geist" and co-host of MSNBC's "Morning Joe." Here are his observations on his first trip to the Masters.

Released on 3/7/2012

Credits

Starring: Willie Geist

Transcript

00:01
Hey I'm Willie Geist from MSNBC, I host a show
00:04
that comes on every day at 5:30 in the morning,
00:07
so, although you may not know me right away
00:10
I assure you I am huge with overnight shift workers,
00:14
nursing mothers, people who fall asleep with the TV on,
00:17
exotic dancers, drug dealers, folks awoken
00:20
in the darkness of night by varmints rifling through
00:22
the trash outside, and vagrants who watch the program
00:25
through the windows of electronics stores just trying
00:28
to stay warm from the glow of the bank
00:31
of flat screen televisions.
00:33
Perhaps because of that broad appeal, I was invited
00:35
generously, by Golf Digest to go to the 2011 Masters
00:39
and to write about it for the magazine
00:41
for this year's April issue.
00:43
This despite the fact that I am quite candidly
00:45
a dreadful golfer.
00:47
I only really play at the small public nine hole
00:50
on Shelter Island, New York where the Caesar salad
00:52
in the clubhouse gets more grooming than the fairways
00:55
out in the course.
00:57
Finest hour at that track, they call it goat hill,
01:00
came several summers ago when my tee shot at the
01:02
par three fifth flew the green, drilled the broad side
01:06
of a passing Budweiser delivery truck and bounced back
01:09
onto the green, where I two putted for par.
01:12
And that was about as good as golf has gotten for me.
01:15
Doesn't mean I don't like golf, I really do.
01:17
It's just that to someone who has played sports
01:19
his whole life, it is club throwingly frustrating
01:23
to be worse at a game than this lady.
01:26
In my defense, she was really good with the blade,
01:29
little short off the tee, though.
01:30
There are, in fact, a lot of things I love about golf,
01:33
even if playing golf is not necessarily among them.
01:36
Five quick ones for you.
01:37
Number one, I love that half the players in the field
01:40
are told to pack up their stuff and get the hell
01:43
out of town halfway through a tournament.
01:45
We should apply the cut to other sports;
01:47
if you stink, you're gone.
01:49
The next time Mark Sanchez has a bad first half for the Jets
01:51
put him on a plane out of town.
01:54
And don't just pull the goalie after he gives up four goals
01:56
in the first period of an NHL game,
01:58
throw him out of the arena.
02:01
Just a thought.
02:02
Second thing I love about the game,
02:03
the spectators at golf tournaments walk
02:05
around the course in spikes
02:07
to watch the players play golf.
02:09
I'm gonna wear cleats and stirrups to the Yankees
02:12
home opener this year in the same spirit,
02:14
or hockey skates to the next Rangers game.
02:17
Number three, Ryan Moore wears a tie to work.
02:20
Really helps him stand out around the office.
02:22
That guy, buckin for a promotion.
02:25
Number four, the Waste Management Phoenix Open.
02:28
Doesn't quite surpass the Pool and Weeneeder
02:30
Independence Bowl in title sponsor absurdity,
02:33
but it does threaten.
02:34
Again, it is a golf tournament sponsored by
02:36
the management of trash.
02:38
And number five on the list, I love that there is a place
02:42
on this Earth where Fuzzy Zoeller
02:45
is considered an athlete.
02:47
And that place, is the Champion's Tour.
02:50
You gotta love golf.
02:51
Big thanks to my good friends at Golf Digest
02:54
for letting me tag along at the Masters last year.
02:56
I wanna be very clear that my schedule every first
02:59
weekend of April for the rest of my life is wide open.
03:02
Thanks guys.
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