The Grind
Humor

7 Things You Need to Know About the NBA Season

Alex Myers discusses LeBron’s new kingdom, an ageless wonder and an overrated signing as a the 2018-19 season starts.

Released on 10/15/2018

Transcript

00:00
So the NBA is back, and I couldn't be more excited.
00:02
In fact, everyone here at Golf Digest
00:05
is so excited about hoops that we recently
00:07
had our first company basketball game.
00:09
And it was only one season-ending injury.
00:11
No, really.
00:13
Someone tore their Achilles.
00:14
I wish I was kidding.
00:16
Anyway, there's so much to get caught up on
00:18
before the NBA season starts.
00:19
Here are seven things you need to know.
00:22
Number one, the Lakers aren't expected to win a title,
00:25
but they are basketball Twitter's version of the Dream Team.
00:28
Aside from King James, you have the King of Memes,
00:30
Lance Stephenson, plus other lightening rods like,
00:33
JaVale McGee, Rajon Rondo, Michael Beasley,
00:36
Lonzo Ball, and by extension, LaVar Ball.
00:40
It's just too bad for us East Coasters
00:41
that the Lake Show is gonna be on so late most nights.
00:45
Number two, speaking of LeBron,
00:47
you should know that for the first time
00:48
since 2010, he won't be crowned
00:51
King of the Eastern Conference
00:52
because he no longer plays in the Eastern Conference.
00:55
So Celtics, Sixers, Raptors, Bucks, this is your chance
01:00
to get absolutely slaughtered in the NBA finals.
01:03
Number three, the Atlanta Hawks
01:04
are going to suck as evidenced by Vegas
01:07
picking em to win a league-low 23 games.
01:09
But at least they're gonna be fun to watch
01:11
with Traesanity, Linsanity, and Vinsanity.
01:15
By the way, Vince Carter, aka the dunking GOAT,
01:18
can still do 360s as he nears his 42nd birthday.
01:22
What a freak!
01:23
And you can't talk about freaks
01:25
without talking about the Greek Freak
01:28
who became the first player in NBA history last season
01:30
to finish in the top 20 in total points,
01:33
rebounds, assists, steals, and blocks.
01:35
If he keeps that up, he might just win MVP.
01:37
And I might finally learn how to say his actual name.
01:40
Number five, my Knicks still stink.
01:42
However, they have several exciting young rookies
01:46
including Kevin Knox, and they're gonna have
01:48
a lot of cap space next summer.
01:51
So now's the time to get your hopes up
01:52
that they're going to sign Kevin Durant,
01:54
Kyrie Irving, and start a dynasty!
01:56
Because it's not gonna happen.
01:59
It never does.
02:00
Number six, Carmelo Anthony is now on the Rockets and
02:04
(yawns) sorry but, (exhales)
02:07
that's pretty much what I think about that.
02:09
Which leads us to number seven,
02:11
the Golden State Warriors are still the best,
02:13
and no one is beating them.
02:15
Even if the Rockets take a three to two lead
02:18
again in a Western Conference Finals,
02:19
Chris Paul will get hurt once again
02:21
to pave the way for Steph Curry's crew
02:23
to win a fourth title in five years.
02:27
(sighs) Suddenly, I'm not as excited for the season
02:30
as I was a couple minutes ago.
02:32
(hip hop music)
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